as my kids like to say..

So Saturday was a gorgeous and sunny day.    Like A lot of Loves,  I was beyond giddy about the planned lunch/tweetup being that not only was my mom watching the two older kids, but my husband said he would tag along!

Like Marilyn the prospect of getting out with grown ups was all the sunshine and unicorns I could ask for on a sunny Saturday.  Getting to meet the gorgeous woman and awesome cookie maker from Notes From the Cookie Jar, made it even more cooler.

Suffice it to say, that and then the mind boggling good service we got at TJ Kids whilst shopping for a car seat for T….what more could a parent with no life ask for!?

And I will say it again….The Lower Mainland of BC is FILLED with amazing bloggers!   I love being surrounded by women that while stuffing bits of fruit in babes happy mouths can discuss SEO, affiliate marketing and creative writing, and then WITHOUT BATTING AN EYELID, switch to discussing diapers and strollers.

Every event I attend, mom oriented or not is filled with amazing bright and clever blogging women.   Every woman blogs for a myriad of reasons….but friendship and community building is usually in that list.

Every event I attend women from all walks of life, with different goals, lifestyles, you name it are drawn together by blogging and the love of writing…whether they do it for money or just for the joy of it.

Again,  as I have said her and over at Wet Coast Women, I feel truly privileged and honored to meet all these people.

Again, as I have whined about before….I wish I could bring them all together.   I wish I had the opportunity to show  to the rest of the world the brains and beauty and friendship that exists in just this small part of Canada….we would blow their minds.

Sponsors and meeting spaces…I am looking at you!!

I will probably be struck of the mom bloggers Christmas list because of this, but here goes….

As I lay awake in the wee small hours waiting for Tara to make up her mind if she was going to sleep or scream a little more, I was perusing the Twitter stream on my iPhone.

Someone….I am sorry, I forget who, posted a link to a post by Lindsay Ferrier of  Suburban Turmoil fame called ‘The Little Blog.’

It is a nice little post.   She waxes a wee bitty poetic about the hows and why’s she started her blog and what it meant to her over the years.  She also talks about the growing popularity, ad deals and writing gigs that have been spawned from her ‘little blog.’

She then goes on to say how nowadays she feels so out of place at blogging conferences etc., since she was there to meet friends and everyone else seemed to be there to learn how to make money.

Yes, Lindsay, they do that because that is what happened to you.

It is because of the popularity and marketability of mom bloggers like yourself and the few ‘blessed’ ones out there, that mom bloggers around the world with ‘Little Blogs’  have started to focus on things like monetization instead of  say ‘keeping it real.’

Though, I think the majority DO keep it real…I think any ‘characterization’ in their blogs may come sometimes from a need to protect themselves and their families.

Most mom blogs out there are pretty raw and honest, however I think many (myself included) do hold back a fair bunch for the sake of the respect I have for my family.

The Little Blogs are still out there.  They don’t have the traffic a blog such as yours might have.  They don’t have hundreds of commenter’s per post – they have one or two.

Advertising agencies are not ASKING them to join. They are asking the ad agencies if they could POSSIBLY be considered.   They don’t have writing gigs or book deals.  They don’t get asked to speak at conferences.

They blog.  They write their mommy blogs.    They keep it real.   They write about their families.

They also learn about marketing.  They learn about improving their writing.  They learn the ins and outs of building an online presence.

There is nothing wrong with that at all.

While I absolutely LOVE the friends I have made through blogging.  Feel really truly blessed by meeting these people in real life or not.  I also feel truly blessed because of the knowledge about marketing, business, writing and so on that my plowtering about on the internet has given me.

And yes, I appreciate the teeny tiny amount of money I have earned because of my blog.  It pays for things like hosting and any technical help I may need.

It does not allow me to travel to all the many mom-centric conferences.   It does not pay my bills.

It perhaps makes me feel slightly lets guilty about the time I spend on the internet.

Suffice it to say, the Little Blog is still out there.  You just don’t go there.

And all those little blogs out there want their blogs to turn into big blogs like yours.

I posted about it here on MY blog instead of commenting on Lindsay’s blog…NOT for increased traffic to mine or to start drama….but really my comment would be LOST amid the currently 133 comments already there.   Instead MY readers can tell me what they think and I will be happy with that.

Having three kids is a bit crazy.   Things all take a bit longer and are a bit more complicated when you add a third kid……room in cars for car seats, room in house for cribs and beds, seats at restaurants, hands to hold, and so on.

Throwing a baby into any dynamic always causes a bit of an adjustment.  Just getting out of the house takes a bit longer.  Things are forgotten.  Children that once relied on YOU to remind THEM to bring stuff, soon find out they are shit outta luck.

I growl at mine that they are lucky I remember to feed them.

Tara has made things maybe a bit more crazy than other babies.     And I have realized that she was doing this even before she was born.

She was breech.  She refused to not sit up!  Her favorite  position in utero was upright…straight up and down…legs curled around.  And that is pretty much the way she wanted to and could sit at an extremely early age.

So there went my dreams of an home birth.  I don’t think my husband or my mom really took me seriously about this.   But I was serious.  Caity had come hard and fast, so I really wasn’t looking forward to a race to the hospital again.   Also, I was deeply concerned about the kids.   I didn’t want them left at home.  I didn’t want them NOT being a part of this.

So Tara refusing to turn was a big let down for me.  For sure I had very confident midwives who had done breeches..and I suppose if I hadn’t lost Scott, I wouldn’t have been so skittish about that and just gone with their instinct on the whole thing.

But they knew I was uneasy about that.  So instead they TRIED to find doctors in the Lower Mainland who would be willing to deliver a breech baby.   They are few and far between.   They had a couple lined up…but again….really all now depended on what Tara wanted to do.

By this time the stress of it all was getting to me.  I was at the point where I just really wanted her OUT and SAFE and it all over and done with.

So when I realized my labour was on the clock….leading up to the end of the willing doctors shift…..I was more than resigned to the inevitable c-section.

Therefore, apart from all the fun of what was a ‘useless’ few hours of contractions….I was pretty calm about it all.  And so was Patrick.

However..my children and my mom were not.     My mom, who had just been freaking from day one was freaking the kids out and they all felt cut off and left out and I hated that I could not make Tara’s delivery a better experience for them.

So that has been our T.

Full of joy.  Full of energy.

She never sleeps longer than two hours.  EVER.

She never sits still.

She doesn’t fall asleep in your arms.

She wiggles.  She bounces.  She yells.

She moves.

I will sell my soul for someone out there who can help us get this child to sleep.

She is almost 8 months old.

I am losing my mind.

My total lack of sleep is KILLING all the joy that should be had in having such a fun and crazy baby.

Life feels on hold instead of being relished and enjoyed.

The whole family is cranky from disturbed sleep.    Everyone is woken by Tara.    All night long.

This is not healthy for any of us.

We love our little girl, but she needs to sleep. Four hours would rock. I then could handle and enjoy all her crazy energy and still feel like could accomplish something during my day and not have the entire Sauriol clan growling and snarking at each other.

Go to sleep little T.

I have come to the conclusion that on the whole…I can handle the mechanics of parenting just fine. Poop and puke in all it’s shapes, forms and volumes really don’t bother me that much.

I will also say, despite the state of my house and whatever my MOM will say on the subject, that I can handle all the basics in keeping babies and children alive.

I can dress the suckers, feed em, and make them fairly presentable. I also do remember to bathe them on occasion too.

Just because my home looks like something from a TLC reality drama does not mean that I do try to keep things clicking along.

Really, I do.

I can ‘do’ babies no problem. Feed em, dress em, hug em and love em. Forgive them for never sleeping and stick a silly smile on your rough and wretched face.

When they start talking back is when I have noticed that my skills seem to lack.

Now that my kids are school agers, things tend to get more heated around here. Authority is questioned a lot around here, and frankly, I don’t blame them. Would you take ME seriously? No.

The attitude around here from the shorter members of the family seems to be of total superiority over the taller members. While they admit to loving us and thinking we are great (heck, Caity has me roped into her Ninja Destroy Santa Plan when she is 20) and funny and so on….figures to fear we are not.

And yes yes blah blah blah, parents shouldn’t be feared. But kids SHOULD have fear of consequences and consequences when you are a kid USUALLY entails SOMETHING to do with pissing your parents of and the fall out from that.

My kids couldn’t give a rats ass about what consequences there are.
I have said before…Caity should be recruited by the CIA..she will NOT break under torture. I think she could probably fool a polygraph too. I am not kidding.

To the kids….us parents are just foolish minions with wallets.

We try reason. We try feel good touch feely new parenty psycho babble about feelings and trust and team work and you can see their eyes glaze over.

We try the old school YOU WILL BE PUNISHED FOR THIS INFRACTION.

They roll their eyes and shrug it off.

We take away tv, we take away toys, video games you name it.

They may moan and groan about it…but instead of trying to FIX things…to talk about the behavior…they just endure their time away from their precious toys and celebrate their reunion with them.

WTF!???

I am remembering now why I never really ‘liked’ kids until I had my own!

I do realize that there is a TON of ‘help out there for parents to find. All sorts of parenting classes, books etc..but I did that.

I think it boils down to personality. I am not and my husband is not a parental figure really…We try….we LOVE our kids…we ADORE being parents…but I really think we are doing it wrong.

Not wrong enough to mess them up…I think they are amazing kids and their strength of personality and bloody mindedness will do them just fine into the adult years.

But I will have a heart attack if I cannot come up with some sort of plan to just once in a while get them to LISTEN and DO WHAT I HAVE ASKED before I have turned purple.

So the sun was shining.   The weather forecast was looking grimmer for the rest of the week.  So I did it.

After reading tweet after tweet and after having a tiny taste of the mayhem a week ago, I  decided to let the kids have a day out of school and we headed down to see what all the Olympic fuss was about.

Ooooh my feet!

Ooooh those Russians…????

The Russians are gearing up for their own Winter Olympics in 2014 so they are eager to show you how awesome it will be in their own Russian way.

The line up even before the place OPENED (in a totally rejigged Science World) was insane, but thanks to Sochi House and our stunt baby AND stunt granny, we were able to join the ‘family’ line for kids under 4, seniors and disabled.

Note to other venues..WHY DO YOU NOT ALL HAVE THIS?????

Because of this shortened line up, this was the only ‘House’ we visited that day.

And it was kind of clunky. But the kids like the info about the their huge train system and then the happy drumming dancing people too. We left before the glittering accordian players started.

They also like the virtual hockey thing they had set up and I wish they had more of that. The place is geared up for more adult nightly fun from the looks of it and YOWZA the women were hot!

And speaking of hot…

Can you believe this was FEBRUARY!!!????
And I don’t know why Caity was sulking in this shot.

I actually don’t know how they were still functioning by the end of the day. We walked from Science World, along the sea wall, to Yaletown, then up to Robson Square and then on homeward to find the Skytrain!

We were walking about for over 6 hours!
And while the kids drove me nuts…they did not complain about being tired or having sore feet!!!

The hilite of the day was skating at the square. The line up was not that long and it is a great deal.
I didn’t skate as I haven’t skated since high school, but they gave me little cleats to wear to stop slipping and hold up my kids who have never been on ice.

Caity was horrified by how hard it was and Adam loved it.

Thanks again to my mom who handled a thoroughly BORED Tara while I wrangled the future stars on ice.

And thanks again to my mom who put up with my growling at my kids!

It was great to see Vancouver in such a party mode. The city looked great and I hope all the visitors are enjoying themselves as much as the residents seem to be.

The lineups to see all the ‘Houses’ shows how much we all miss the Expo type of thing here. The patience of people boggles me.

So a fellow mom blogger asked if I wanted to check out Baby Bunch and their ADORABLE gifts for baby showers, etc.  After taking a look at the website I was very impressed and now bitter that I did not receive any of their products for MY little one.  HOWEVER, I have a friend ready to pop soon and now I know what to get her!

Yes, they ship to us Canucks!

This is the medium Yellow bunch! It is valued at $59.95.  It contains – all done up flower style – one big, one t-shirt, one hat, two pairs of socks and two onesies.

I cannot get over how pretty these things are.
And this is only ONE cute idea. They have baby outfits done up like cupcakes, lollipops and boxes of crayons.

For presentation alone, these gifts are wonderful for moms to be. But for what you get in these gifts, I think is a great deal.

Want to win a Baby Bunch?

One lucky person will be able to enter to win a medium Baby Bunch valued at $59.95 in their choice of color.  Giveaway ends at  midnight, March 1st,  2010. Open to residents in the US and Canada!

To be part of the draw, head on over to The Baby Bunch and take a look around at all the wonderful products they offer, then come back here and leave one comment telling me what other product you like on their site.

For a 2nd chance to win, follow me on Twitter and send me an @ telling me you love the Baby Bunch stuff!

Also note!! There is a special code for a 15% Discount for readers of Crunchy Carpets good until the end of March!

Code: BUNCHGW10
Shipping is not included in the special discount offer!

And I am Canadian so the FTC can stuff it!  But for FULL disclosure: The product was provided free of charge to me and was sent by the manufacturer or representing Pr agency.  No monetary compensation was provided.

So this might not be perfect WINTER Olympic weather, but I am loving it. Any day when I look up on the way to the park and see an eagle soaring over my head in a clear blue sky is pretty groovy to me.

Any day when I can get me, the baby and the dog out to the park and soak up some vitamin D is a a-okay with me.
Any day when I can tire the kids out after school at the play park in the middle of February is a bonus to me.

It tends to lighten the mood somewhat!

Even when I have heard sad news about a friends mom and am gripped with that shocking sadness you feel for others..that sadness mixed with helplessness…you can’t make them feel better. You can’t take the pain away…..the sunshine today allowed me to breathe. To take a moment.

To take a moment to be sad for my friend and to be thankful for what I have instead of focusing on what I don’t.

We all need to take moments to breathe.

It also helps that this has been a rather fun and busy month. I do better busy. I do better busy even when I am so amazingly sleep deprived. I prefer to be busy instead of just being home tired and thinking about my messy house.

I need to be able to escape the insanity once in a while.

I managed to meet some bloggy/tweety ladies for afternoon tea…..that was civilized.

No kids.

We then got to do the Kinder/Casa Italia gorge fest. The kids are still eating that candy. And that was a great excuse to see some of the Olympic ’spirit’ that is spreading all over the city.

I know I know..it is all hype and marketing. But Vancouver does the ‘jumping the bandwagon’ thing so well and it is fun to see so much red and white and patriotism. It is fun seeing everyone (most everyone) in a good mood! It is nice to see Vancouver putting its best face forward.

The energy is amazing.

And because of the Olympics and Microsoft I managed to see Amber the gorgeous Crazy Bloggin Canuck on a break from being cub reporter for Microsoft and covering all the Olympic fun from a ‘Yank’ perspective!

Am mad that I totally forgot to get a photo of myself and Amber. Was too busy trying to grab dessert samples and hang onto very excited babies.

The folks from Microsoft were so sweet and kind and said LOVELY things about my children, which always makes you feel better!!

I have noticed that there are lots of photos of the restaurant that I did not take.

Hmmmm

There was other strange images of light fixtures and tables that were apparently photo worthy to my kids.

Anyway, it was great to see her again, albeit briefly.

My husband has been working working and working. We have been trying to squeeze in family time on the weekends and try to stay awake when together.

The baby is killing us.
She doesn’t sleep.

The musical beds is taking a toll on all of us.

When I don’t have excuses to flee the house, I tend to focus on sleep and the mountains of laundry this family generates.

Simple tasks start to sound frightening and huge.

I am giddy that I finally got the business taxes done and hopefully sorted out the router today!

Next..my in tray and the linen closet!

Bwaahahahahahaha

Yeah..heh…..I suppose there was a point to this post originally, but it seems to have drifted away.

Okay, so I did not realize that Kinder is made by the folks that make Ferrero Rocher, which sort of explains the addictive quality it is having with my kids.

Hence not cluing in on the Italian connection and why they are a sponsor for the Italian House or ‘Casa Italia’ down at the Roundhouse Community Centre in Yaletown.

Basically right next door to the OTHER ground zero for Olympic entertainment at Livecity.   We checked out the insane lineups to just get in there..yeah…not going to try that with three kids in the rain.

ANYWAY, Kinder invited us down to enjoy some family friendly activities with them and the folks of Casa Italia on Saturday….the 2nd day of the Olympics.

And while I sort of blanched at the idea of getting my family downtown..this was the perfect excuse….and thank goodness for that Canada Line and the people keeping us all moving along!

The crowds down in Yaletown were crazy…but the energy was so fun.

Adam and Caity thought they had died and gone to heaven.  It isn’t often when children are told to grab a back and ‘help yourself’ to ALL THE KINDER CHOCOLATE LAYING AROUND!

It was like a scene from Charlie and Chocolate Factory.

There was face painting…which all kids seem to feel a HUGE need for.

And they had a DJ blasting out family friendly tunes!

And they had a whole photo studio set up and apparently will email us these pro photos of our kids!

There was also an Italian camera man and the sexy Italian ‘host’ of the event too, who seemed to have a blast chatting with all the kids.

There was even WINE for us adults and amazingly yummy sandwiches!

THANK YOU for hosting us! We had a great time.
I also ran into some mom friends of mine from Today’s Parent Magazine which was awesome and I want to thank Emily, Gwen, Anne-Marie, and Mr. Raspberry for coming down too, even though both Emily and Mr. Raspberry ALSO had invites from elsewhere…..I think there was quite the crew through the Yummy Mummy connection.

After that it was quite the adventure to get through the Olympic throngs laden down with Kinder Loot to see what Olympic stuff we could see!

We staggered over to see the stuff at David Lam Park, and it did look amazing.  From the outside.  The music was blasting, and the images and lights were amazing..as was the insane line up to get in through security.

So we hopped (hopped – as in staggered with baby in Bjorn, backpack on back, and whiny kids in tow) down to Canada Place so we could see if we could see the Olympic Cauldron.

We followed the crowds and we did find it…sort of…..through the MASSIVE CHAIN LINK FENCE!

This was all I could see.

And I get the need for the security…when we have those yahoo protesters for hire smashing things up and totally muddying ANY message Anti Olympic people (like me) might want to get out to the world.

But I wish it was in a better location for us lowly humans (non game attending or media pass carrying) to see it better.

We finished of our Olympic night with some McD’s at a surprisingly quiet food fair at the Waterfront Centre. Where people kept singing ‘Oh Canada,’ and then headed down for another trip on the train.

I am glad we didn’t try to bring a regular stroller. We stuffed Tara in an umbrella kind, which did make like a lot easier, although people were all great and helpful and all an all the atmosphere in town is really fun and exciting.

I hope we manage to squeeze in some more exploration of the Olympic entertainment. Perhaps without Tara next time.

The other day, my daughter Caitlyn came and asked if when she was 20 would she be allowed to go to the North Pole.

“Er, yes, I suppose you would.”  I said.

“And mom, how old will you be?”  She continued.

“Em, I will be 55.”

“That isn’t too old is it mom?” She asked me.  ” You would be able to come with me right?”

I blinked.  ”I suppose.  Um why do you want to visit the North Pole?” I asked.  Thinking she had a sudden hunger for the stark beauty of the arctic.

“MOM! REMEMBER!??  SANTA!!!???!!!”

“I need to see him remember!?”

Oh yes,  she wants to see Santa alright.  And not to give the man a hug.   Oh no.  You see.  My daughter has a grudge.  A grudge against the man in red and she apparently is going to wait (and probably hone her ninja skills) till she is 20 to rub out the old man.

And she wants me along for the journey.  Witness perhaps?

She is THAT angry that in her mind, Adam didn’t get what he asked for this year.  In fact he did, but because none of it was a ‘HUGE’ gift, in her mind he got shafted.   She also feels slighted because she did not get the GIANT Barbie house….just a small one.

My daughter.  She does grudges.   She won’t forget this.

Be afraid Santa.

Be afraid.

So my kids don’t sleep.

Adam is a night owl.  Like his dad.  Would MUCH prefer staying up all night long.

Both are BEARS then to get up early in the morning…THOUGH the both seem to have internal clocks that still wake them around 7:30 no matter HOW late they were up.

This can make for really grouchy kids.

Tara sleeps…but only in two hour increments.  We have had the odd three and four hour miracle..but not much.  She is successfully following along in the tradition of being a total pain when it comes to bed time.

What  I find interesting is my perception of this….how I deal with it with each subsequent child.

Adam was our first! Our little prince among princes.  We jumped and gasped and worried at every hitch in his breathe…not a cry was allowed to pass his dainty lips.

Daddy dutifully walked him to sleep every night when we found that only that would do.

This was after stretches in swings, the stroller and the car.

We read every book on sleep and baby behavior religiously.

Caitlyn didn’t want to sleep either.   Only the bouncy seat ON, sitting on the dryer ON would work for any stretch.

She also wouldn’t be put down…ever.   She lived on me.    Or the vibrating bouncy seat.

I would sit up at night rocking her into the wee small hours.   Thank God for our large DVD collection.

We tried it all.  The cereal in the bottles.  Huge feeds before bedtime.  Soothing baths…..swaddling, unswaddling, co sleeping, alone sleeping…you name it, we have probably tried it.

When we started to get really squirrely we thought we might try that ’sleep training’ thing they were all talking about.

I seem to recall sitting outside her door, the both of us in TEARS listening to her crying…I think she cried for maybe 5 minutes.  Ever.

This probably explains why my first children seem to have such huge cases of self entitlement.

Tara is getting a slightly different experience.

Not that she isn’t fussed and coddled over any less. Probably MORE with her doting siblings.

But while she is another non sleeper…she has her own style and pattern different again from the first two.

She isn’t one for being held and does not often now fall asleep in your arms.   At 6.5 months she is pretty programmed at falling asleep in either the crib, the bassinet or the car seat.

I can count on one hand the times she has fallen asleep in the stroller.  The outside world is WAAAY too exciting for our little T.

So with T, I do a little snuggle and a feed and then bundle her up in the crib.  Give her a little bit more of her bottle and then walk away with just some lullabies playing for her….or the radio.  That works too.

She does cry.   But it no longer stabs me in the heart.   And I can tell the cry of really needing mommy and I will come rushing.

So she fusses a bit and falls asleep on her own and she seems to like it that way.

Am I a bad mom for this?  I am sure some will say so.   But she is happy when I put her down and happy when I go into see her.

Has parenting three kids through sleepless nights hardened my heart?  Maybe just a tad.  I can walk away in the middle of the night and be more focused on finding some blessed sleep instead of wringing my hands in anguish and guilt over her cries.

Is it because I am older?  Not wiser for sure….

I don’t feel cruel.  I adore Tara.  We feel so blessed by her presence.   She is a happy exuberant baby and we all feed on her joy.

She just doesn’t sleep enough.  My instincts tell me to just go with what works for now..and try try try to convince her that more than two hours would be a FABULOUS idea!

Mommy is losing her mind.